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Submission
(Ephesians 5:21-25)
Submission. Now there's an emotionally charged and deeply misunderstood topic.
Usually, the first thing that comes to mind when we hear that word is that wives are to submit to their husbands. But we tend to overlook the fact that right before that verse, we find this one:
"Submit to one another our of reverence for Christ."
Before you are tempted to say that the verse refers to the church and not to a marriage, consider this: If the husband and the wife belong to the church, it applies to both of them-they are to submit to one another.
Submission would not be a problem if it were not for the very human tendency to want things our way. Frank Sinatra's "I Did It My Way" is the unabashed cry of the human soul. The world applauds it. The church needs to guard herself against it.
Simply stated, biblical submission means subjecting ourselves--giving preference to--one another. In other words, it means looking out for one another's good. We may like and want things a certain way, but we are commanded to consider whether that is what is best for the other members of the church. We are to look out for what will benefit them rather than for what will benefit us.
That same principle applies to a marriage. Sadly, some husbands misunderstand
the verse that refers to a wife's submission. They overlook the fact that
it was not addressed to them. It does not say, "Husbands, make sure
that your wives submit to you." It was addressed to the wife. ..
for a reason.
"Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord." Submit... as
to the Lord.
Those last four words are the key to this verse. Christ is the pattern. Does our Lord ever force the church to submit to anything?
You see, by its very nature, submission requires that it be born in the heart of the one who submits. Without that free choice, it becomes coercion. That is why no one can make anyone else submit. And that is why the verse is addressed to the wife, not the husband.
If we go back to the essence of submission--looking out for one another's good--this verse is telling the wife to yield for the benefit of her husband. And immediately after this, the husband is instructed to love his wife as Christ loved the church-in a self-sacrificing way. There is no contradiction between "submit to one another" and "wives, submit to your husbands," because husbands are to love their wives. It is a seamless, beautiful, reciprocal principle: Look out for one another's good.
-Maria Lund